Thursday, January 2, 2014

Christmas of the Monkey Butt Powder

Christmas has become very complicated.  It used to be easy when I only had five children to buy for.  Now I have 28 people in my immediate family that require Christmas cheer.  Here's the break down:
1. 1 husband
2. 5 grown children + their 5 spouses/significant others + 1 ex-wife
3.  13 assorted grandchildren
4.  3 aging parents

Christmas occurs just after the end of fall semester, when I've been busy putting together portfolios for finals, etc. This leaves no time to celebrate the season in timely fashion.  My Christmas tree never gets decorated until one of my children takes pity on Christmas Eve.  This year the task fell to Austin who did his best.  I did find the Christmas door jingle bells on the tree.  I didn't say a word.  Last year Ashley came to my aid.  She wasn't available this year because she spent Christmas with Cody's parents... since she never gets to see them.

Anyway... feeling overwhelmed, I told Scott it's time he helped out.  I gave him the task of buying Christmas gifts for our sons (2) and our son-in-laws (3).  You do the math.  He surprised me and agreed.  What surprised me even more was he seemed happy about it.  Since he's a guy he doesn't waste time shopping in malls, he goes online.  Next thing I know suspicious packages start arriving.  Scott even wrapped them himself.  Fast forward to Christmas morning.  I get:
1.  a requested Great Course about the golden age of Dutch Masters (nice)
2. an Audubon bird caller (nice) now I can "tweet" ha ha
3. a log carrier (?)
4. a "Big Ass" bar of soap (?)

The sons/sons-in-law got more useful things, things to help them smell nice and not itch tender places in public.  They will someday thank him.  Merry Christmas.

4 comments:

Ashley Webb said...

Hahahaha! Mom I hope you and Dad never lose your senses of humor. I love you!

Ashley Webb said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Erin Brady said...

I love how the grandchildren are "assorted", like chocolates.:) Great post Mom, this was seriously funny!

Erin Brady said...

p.s. Don seriously thought about putting his Anti-Monkey Butt powder on display at his work.